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$ THE WEEKLY TIMES. VOL. V.-NO. 32. HONEOYE FALLS, N. Y., NOVEMBER 22, 1888. THE WEEKLY TIMES IS PUDLISIIED EVERY THURSDAY. WILLIAM O'BRIEN. PUB. rERMS $1.00 PER YEAR IN ADVANCE. Unte. of AdverU.ln:: IUndo Known OD Application at Offieo. JOB PRINTING. Tm: WEEKLY 'rIMES estnbllshment It now supplied With nil tho mo<ieln appliances and facilities for tho execution \lib ncatuess aud dlspatcb of 0\ cry deser pilon of Book nud Job l'rlntin/t, Buslne'8lartls, n II-Heads, Clr- onlnrs, Small Hund Bills, Invltntions, Wed- ding and Address COlds, Orders 01 Dancing, Lnw Points, etc, Any lcgol advertising not controlled nnd gil en out by tho llo\ d of SnpervJsors enn bo publl,hed In nny pnper In the ('Onntl, J,eglll AdvertIsements at Illtes fixed by lnw. Jlll.lness Notl~es Inso1 tod on LocnlI'n!!,e 56. per line. Till; maximum on lIsted strongtll Ul the United States army is 25,000 men, Ilnd, according to tho latest I'cport us to Its govel'nment, there have been no less than 1,730 eourts-marti,ll and 10,H7 trl,tls before garrison and regimental courts Within the past year for otIenses of amoro 01' loss serIOus <>haracter. SOMEHOW OR OTHE~ Llr~. hns n. burden tor~; onc's sho'tltler, None ma~ esc \PO flom Its trouble .mu c lrc; M\s It 111 louth, nud 'twill come \hCll w~~ o'der. AUlI fit liS as claRo as tho £arments we II car. Sarlow comes into our homes unmvitctl, llolJuin:; our hearts or lts treasures ot sonp', Lovers (!IOW cold, nml out' rllcnushiL15 uro sl'ghtcu, Yet somehow or other \\: 0 \\ orry along. ~!lust the slleet blossoms that smllo In our taces Grow tho rani, weed. that \\ould polson aUlI Ili i sht; AUlI o'er In tho midst of earth's beauiliul places Tbere ,,1\\ a~s Is something that Isn't quite r'sht Yet oft Irom n rocl< we may pluel, n r:ay flower, Anll drinlt Crom a spring in ,\ (losol,no \\.\5tC rrhc~ come to tho he.1ft 111m a ho.\\ cnl,) dO\'tCl: And Ilaught IS so Sll eet to the el e or the t\ste. EI ory day toll Is el'ery day IllesRlnr:, 1.'hough PO\ Clrty's cotta~o anu crust we m~y sh.lrc, Wcul,1S the bael< on which burdens are press fng, But stout IR the heart that Is stlengthencd by plalcr, SomoholV or other tho pathway r:rows brl~htcr, Just \\ hen We mourn thero ,\ as none to be' fllcnil , Hope In the heal t maltes tho burd~n grow lighter, AmI somehow or other\ e get to tho entl -lIr El'-fib 1/, J[, Grav, THE AMATEUR FARM. Drief Dlssertation on Its Many Try- ing VIClBsltude3. The Terrors of J\[cctlnr: tho RUf\ve nnft In'\' 5111ua.tln~ nool' AJ;;'cllt ,\ThoiO ::\fulll ... tudlnfH1'I anti 'VlIv 'VnytJ Al'O l'nst.l!~lnIUng- Out. I r is announccd th,tt IMPct' bottles aro to be manufactul'cd on a ,ery ex- tensivo scale, Theil' wClght is loss than glass 01' stonoware, and thcy uro A pel'son on nn Itmttteur farm is, to less liablo to breakagc, Paper being a cerLain extent, isol.lteJ, and is lit tho also an excellont non-conduclO1', fluids mercy of vllrious mtl! 'Idot'd tlMt in- fest civilized-or, as I ,ttU spoaking of ,toled in ail-tight papcr bottles w,ll . tl t d ' t 1 f J am,ttem· fMnltng, pet'haps I shonld \I IS an a moro 1t1 enso ( egl'oo 0 leat ' . I' d 't 'I' Id I I · I slty-sClnl-clvl IZC some y, t'<lmps, 01' co t lUn w 1011 pnt 111 orduHu'y bot- bO(ll ts t p III I' It' tl c a,g-cn , reo G( ( Ol'S, 19' 1 lllng- es. roel men, instil anco soliCitor\ and all TIlE Scotch thread-m,lkoI'R aro buy- mg vast quantities of \oDd fol' making spools in this conntl'y, Bangor, 1\1e\ I is tho chicf export P01llt, ono I1t'11\ alone ' shipping over 7,000,000 fcet of spool stock. Tho lumber, us It is s,t\ved out, I\ c,llled spool bars, It IS cut in vari- ous thicknessos, foul' feet long, It'om the best white bi! oh timber, and is tied Up in bundles, eonveniont for hand- ling. that SOt t of tcrrOt' Imve tho amatctll' f,It'tl1et' 01' Ins 'I ife at thall' mOl'c\' You Cttn't Spl'Ing an clccLl'ic al'l\1ng-c· ment and call In II pollConmn 01' Ollt the liro dep,u'tmcnt If you turn the handlo too far. Even lf you shont for help tho neighbors are too distant to helll' yon. Thu\ it is that my farm is set out With kinds of koes that 1 didn't want, and that tho buildings aro coverod With insurance and lightmng 1'0<1. and that my book cases gt'Oltn with yolumes that no one ever thinks of roadlllg. its height, thero came a ring at the doot'-bell, The girl went to the door and came back with a ne,lt e.lt'd in hoI' haud on \\hwh WOI'O beautifully en- gt',L\ cd tho word, \Ei.lith illotter\ wick,\ \Deal' mo,\ said tho lauy of the house, wiping' hel' tom'lto stainp.d hands on tho Idtchell towol and takin'\ tho Cdld, \I don't \I ant to sec an; body. I don't lomombct, that n,\Ine. What did slle look !tkc? 1Llll sho a parcol?\ uNo, tna'ln n \Is she an ag-ent, do you thinl,?\ \She don't look Itko one\ \Had sho a subsct'lption book in her hand?\ \No nm'alll, nothing but a nico pal'- 41501 wtth I,ICO on it,\ \J)ld ~'ou show hel' in the pat'IOl'?\ ·tyC~, llla'uln.\ \Then tell hOI', please, that I'll be down in a few minutes,\ 'Vlth that tho ,\orriml woman ran up stalt·s, hastily rcmovcd all tl'aees of tho tomato fight, put on a nico dt'css, fixod up hcr hail' a btt, pinned a blooch III plaec, slipped on an assol't- mcnt of I'ings, g,wo hoI' !lushed ftlcO a fow d,lshes of powder, took a pack~ ward glanco at thc mirt'or to seo thab; the dl'<lpery hung ull right and then camo dOli n to the pal'lol' with the stately ail' of a lady of infinito leisure I'athol' than the man not' of an over- worried am,lteUt' farm or's wife. I She appl'o,whed her \ iait~ with that ILlI' of non·commltt,tl reservo that may in tl moment bt ighten Into a genial ,\ elcomo 01' freo7.o into frigtd disnltssal, which ladios seem to know how to a,- sume toward those [>bout whom there b doubt ,IS to tbo l1o,il'abllity of fur- thet, acqUlullUtnCo, The viHttor I'OSO with a pleasant snulo, and smd: \1 am so plo,\s()(l to moet you, but 1 ,un afr,ud 1 havo come at an ilHtppl'o- priate ttllle,\ \Oh not at all,\ was tho \llle.Huliu roply. \I was talking about liWI',IlUl'e 11 itll l\lts. Blanl;: tho other d,IY and she s,lld that ~ ou were' Ct'j' fond of I·o,ullng.\ \Yes 1 mn, but I am sort'y to say that at this se,lson of tho yetiI' It is haru to got much Wno for I e.tulIlg \ It 11 ,tS certainly ,t most lIlappl'opriato time for the discussion of lttortttul'o, Only too pl,linl,l' \\ as in tito an' the sccnt of burning tOl11atoes, and tbo mlstross was CCl't,lm th:.t the maid II ould pour tho red·hot mixturo 1IIto au 1('e-eold glass Jar a11(l ,Ipltt it lIlto n thousaud ft'dgmonts, \Th JUHt It,\ resume(l tho visitor, airily, \If a pOl',on desiros to red(l one IUUSt t,lko it ltl seeLlOns, Noll'] Tho book agent is a terror, equaleel only by the frtllt-lree man. I Im~ e often Sltt up nights pondering' over the questIOn; \Which is the worso of tho twor\ Sometimes I thought ono llltJ', sometimes another, depondlllg on wlncl\ am selllllg\-hmo sho wlnpped ont of them yislteel mo last, I am nsn,tlly from undel' her clo.l k a 1,Il'ge thlll 1 m . of tho opmion that the book agont is PCt'-col'el'od \mst tllment\-\,I most the worse, for tho B. A. is genor,llly a remark,tblo 1\ ol'k, 'Tho l'lCtorlltl Ilts\ woman. tory of Sp,tin,' Hupcrbly Illustratcd- The othor week ono of them came completc ln thirty-six parts-one PIli; around but nobody was at homo und lImonth, or two or fOUl', Just a~ you ANENT Thanksgiving and Christmas she contonted herself with thrustlllg ohoose-at twenty-fivo cents a pal't·1 times is tho satisfactOl'y consciousness undcr the dool' a circulal' doscrlblllg Agonts usually sell SU~)I lIrt numbers A)IONG the exhibits at the !lowo\' \how of the Now J orsey IIorticuitm,ll Socioty, which was held in East I Orange, is \1\lt's. Hardy,\ a new ohr.\\- 5anthe11\um from Japan. It isoxhilllte<l by James R. Pitchol', of Short Hills, I mel is sai(l to bo tho only 0110 in the country. It was bought at a prioe \I'unning into the thousllnds,\ The flower measures eight inche~ aoross, und IS f011\' inches high. tl 1 t f ' 1 I t' at Imy cents Ot' ol1e <lollar e,wh', but that this is a yeal' of plenty thtOughout 10 a< van ages 0 a serllt wor, on I- tl .1 \rl nil I Y t f S ' \ this 11 ith a eomploto\ etc, etc, tho country, as l'egllrds tho crops. The eu,' le.L lC orm cdS ory 0 palll, B t 1 t 'I t .1 t I am sure th,tt If an indt!!lhtnt look 'hought of 1886 and 1887 III tho \rest U w Ut lII\eres eu me mos was a .. t b 't f I' 1 '1 tid eould h,we olllltet'Uteel It book lIgent II as not relleated this YClIr. In tho ol'n I 0 paper w nc 1 .le,agen 1.1 d d d h h th,tt volublo lady would not still bo 01110 Valle,v thore has never befot e .'oppe unawares an w 10 was as f 11 selllllg this v,llu,lble !tter,lry produc- bcen such a bountiful YlOld of fruits of 0 ows: nil kmds as was onjo,led this season, PRIVATE AND CONFIDENTIAl, of tho bdy agent. I wouldn't h,wo MOVABLE HOUSES. HUSBAND AND WIFE. A. DrcaUl 1,hlch 1\11 Ima:;:ln ,Uve Wrltel The nA3!110n Why ::Uarrlar:c lit Yery Fre· CaU .. \ rrol,hecl. qucnt1y 1\ l'nlhllC. In this ago, \holl tt',tI'cling may be 1I[any leltcI's wo havo rcad With sad· smd to be almo,t a pas~ioIl, and when ness lately, pl'ove thut tho majority 01 so much has beell dOlle for tlto benefit unhappy homes ha\'e resulted fl'om too of those who uro fOll[l of roaming, i1 slight acquaintanco previous to mill'· is stl'ange that no sy\tom of mO\',lble l'ia:,rc, A hanlsomo face, a pt'etty fig- houscs has yot been de\'lsed. The ure, tho step that Stttts in a waltz, the great improvements in pal'lor cars elhtttel' that ,\In uses for an hont·, aro in gi\'os II hint of how thiS shonld bo dono, too many cases all that is deemed Already Otll' millionaire3 ami railroad net'es,;u'y fa I' a !tfe-Iong companion- potontates havo theil' pli\'ato palacos I ship, Others lll\\'e fmled bee,\use edeh fittcd UJl Ilith ovory convenicneo and stlu'ted With the ilien that milrl'lllgo luxury, in which they might I ive for i me,\II~ getting, not giving; tho man 11\- weeks at a tuno, h,lI'ing their cars tent only on tho comfort he c til obta1l\ switchod on tho sidings ,It any place I from un \lnlMtd housokeopm', tho whore they wish to remain, 'I'll a dim- 'I womaa on the attontton and adulatton cultios, however, h,lve yct to bo over- of un evel'-prosent loyer. No altera- como before these cars can be regard, tions in marriag'e lall s or clyil con· ed as at all sal1sfactory as places fol' tl'<\CtS can mako such ul1lons happy or continuod residenoe. ~uccessful. III tho fil'st place, fhe~o is seldom Let men Imu'n to bo patient and sym- any provision mudo in thcm for tho pathetiC, to pau\e sometimes 11\ their ontertalllmont of friends on any !ttl'go fuller, moro \aried Iii os to brighten scale. Thclt· owners having remaincd With ,I !tttIo thought and la\'o the dull- for some time in any city and onJoyed el', mal'O monotonous oncs of their tho hospitaItty of fdond., aro debarred womon·foll,; ami lot woman re- by tho IHlrrOI'lIleSS of their quartors alizo that tho !tves of truo from roturning the soc tal kindnoss 01 mon and citizens can not always which they havo been made the recipi- be cramped within thell' narrowor onts. It is necossal'y that tho parlor home cil cle, and strivo to take an un- ettl' shall bo doveloped until it contains 6elfish pleasure lI\ and to show a ready d1l\iug rooms, pariors, dining halls, symp,\thy With thoso widor outsldo in- and oven b,\ll rooms, sUlted for tho en- torcsts and ambittons. J list imagino tho tortainment of large comp,lnies. This kind of thing which a FlCllchman who will probably nccessit,lto tho llltl'oduc- in theot'Y hold tho 10ga!tLy of marriage tion of a wldm' gaugo than is !It pros- to bo unllnport,U1t to mOl'als, would cnt commonly employod; unless some havo Wtlttcn, and contrast It With that arr,U1gements can be made for the uso lotter, and its note of lIltenso, though of tr,wks running upon tho doublc conventIOnal, domesLtC IHety. Thot'e trueks with which roads aro ai- aro scores of lettel's bl'eathing th,lt ready provHlcd, Tins Will naturally spit tt, though usually expt'ossOll II Ith oomo in timo, all (1 the people lUuch more clnms1l\css, lIud, to use the \Ill sond out illntatlOlls for word which best expresses tho fact, ontel'tainments to bo gl1'on in half a \humdrunHlless It is thut qualtty dozen cities, on as many dlfforent dates, which is to us tho eatl,f,LCtot'y fcatuI'o with tho eomfortable feeling that at the of tho letters, specifiocl timo theil' own houses will bo The hmnd t'ums are in England tho in tho places named. It Will be so en immense maJority, and to Judg-e from at a glanco how much this will add to theso Icttel's, they have no mOt'O 111- tho \ lit ioty of sociul lifo, lind as lt is tention of attacldn,< the nMl'rt,tge laws, diroctly in tho lino of the gl'owing cos- as ttl' as tItelt' m,tin jlrtllclplo IS con- mopolitanism of the country, tho sug- cerlled, than thoy 1t,\I'O of Ilgttlltlllg gestion should appeal at onco to pop- aglllnst tho principlo of c,lI'eat omptor, ulal' intelligence. 01' tho rule th,lt It Jury should Tho \econd ditllculty with tho exist-' consist of twelve, They It/we, in ing stato of things is tho fact that cars fact, 1Ie\el' considered lI1<tt'tiag(J as un sWltohod onto a sHlmg uro almost suro lIlstltutlOn like any other, but ,IS a 1m- to be in uudesil\lblo pl\l'ts of tho town, n1<l1l condltiou, the vOI'y healthiest wluthel' se!f-t'especting ple,lst\t'e-seek- st,lte of mind a community could on- el's might unturally find It awkward to JOY, It is only \hen a commulllty I'osort. 'Whon once II pt opel' system of fecls that marringe lH'ocls to bc su~ houso cnl's 11<ls bcen adopted, tho Iloxt lained by Hrgumont, tll<lt it beg-lIIs to stop \ill bo for the resOI'I'lttlOn oj be In dallgm', Even the few who squUl'es ill tho fashionablo quar- would nboh\h marriage have never tel' of tho town, laid with cOlll'enient re,tlly consHlorcd tilelt' propos,ll, fOt' tracks and sWltchcH and hil'ed out fol' they neIther sugge\t It substitute, 1101', longot' Ot' shol tel' perIOds to proprie· t tOI'8 of It',wollllg 111.\11 S 1011 8. As money has long' stUce ceasod to bo tin obJect to American millionail'es, thoy wI, I undoubtedly bo willing to plly gener- ously for such accommodations, lind the genet'al rosult will be s,ltlsfactol'y pocumary returlls to the holders of lots, con venience to the voyaging householders, lind a pleasant vadoty both in tho appeal'anco and social life of fashionable noighborhoods, All this is said, not so much in the way of suggestion, as of prophecy; but Slllce it is well to accustom ourselves to pos- sible innovations, howover startling. the idea IS worthy of the gl'l1Yest con- sideratioll.-IJoston COlli tel'. npp,uently, have thought for an in- stant \h the socml cons<>quenccs would be, to what utter slavCty It would reduce womon-to \I hom, a[tot forty, a throat of dt vorel) would bo 11ko a sentonce of slow de,\th-or llh,tt the ruin It would work on tho Iloxt genel',\- tion, The'y proposo the chllngo to get rid of discomfol't, Just as they Pt'opose feder,ltioll to be rid of the Irish dim- oulty, 01' socialism to bo rill of OOOlI- sional cases of sutIet'Ulg ft om want. Thelt· lightnoss of thought IS bad; but, liko tho den~ity of the it, opponents' thought, it 11l'OVOS lh,lt thot'e IS 110 1'0,\1 q ucstlOn 111 tho publIC milld -Lol!(lol~ Spectator. _ ---\'0-.0 .... ___ _ THE LEBEL RIFLE. I tion, But it shows tho hetOie brtlvery Even tho oldest inhabitants acknowl- (N B -This must on no lIecount be shown been in hOt' place fOI' a farm. edge that they never saw the liko in \ cven to your best l!lend ) Anel yet-I coul(lIU\l'(Hy beliove it, THE RU LER OF JAPAN. A WC!l~':,~ ';:;~!111 'TrJ~~~lh,~':;n~'(~I~II~~~,1 Trust lbundance and quality. It Is unfortunately nolV the case thut mnny beclluse, you seo, I'vo been m,tl'riecl a Roforms En!lcte<l by tho nrut.uhlto, tho Tho French valuo tho sect'et of their persons object to II cqll from n bool< ago nt, gl'eat many ye,u's-nothing terrlblo Holgnln!: Mllmtlo, new magazlIIo rille-tho Lebol-so 'I' N Such bmng the ease It behoo'!es the succcssiul 1 1 '1'1 1 d f tl I The young l\Iikado, l\[utsulnto, tho much that the trool1s havo been or- HE ew York Herald revives tho agent to talce mOle than OIdmaty care In ap. UlppenC(, 10 a yo te IOUSO mOl'e- luestlOn of an extension of the Pres i- prouenlng (\ customer [t h ,vlngbeen reportcd Iy smd Umt whon sho bought a book 123d Emperorof tho nameless dyn,tsty, dered not to uso It when mountlIlg lential term to six veal'S, and says: \It to us thtlt people have dehbel,tel, slammed sho was in tho Imlllt of gOlllg to a book- was the first of Ins lino to t,tlw o.tth liS guard or taking IMrt 1Il mltllC\l\'ers. J tho Iloor in the laces of OUI' agent. be foro \ d 1 ' f I If '1'1 u rulct', For these l_lUrposes thett' old bl'ccch- IS stud by those competent to form an \ord could be s,lla, we have gIven the subject store an se ectlllg or 101 so , len ostunllte that the shrinkage in tho in- ' much thou:;ht and h\ve compiled\ set of ,nics she went back to the fintll conquest of On the 12th of April, 1868, he made loudors of tho 18H typo ure to be em- ternal commorce and indusllles of the I Wsu\clcCehs'si! stlletly lalla well, IS sure to result In tho luscious tomato,-Lukc Shari), 111 oath before gods and men that, \a ployed, This plan may Qt' m,IY not D t t F P delibe1'l1tivo ,tssembly should be prove effectual in prevonttll!! tho Gor- Umted States in the llUst foUl' months, Plfst-Dless 111<0 nlady or gentleman e 1'01 'rcc res~. 1 .. S I I I I formed; all measures should be de- mans from e,lrl1lng' the myst01Y of the IIhICh clln be tracod to allprohension, econd-lIavo no boo < or p.\ee VIS bel\ * d ~'hltd-'ro gain the confldenco of the person ElectrIcity as LIght, Olded by pub IC op1l110n; an Lobol powdct', winch oxplodes noiso- eXCltemont and other conditions do- \\proached and Obt,lill admittance to tile th,tt intellect und loarning should be lessly and without jlroductllg any I pendent upon tho Presidential c,tm- house proceell as -- Acting on l\Iaxwoll's theory that -sought for tlnoughout the world, in smoko, but It must h,wo II pOl'llous ton- [lnlgn, amounts to not lcss than $500,- Thcre it lelt oil' just at the most ox- light IS really an electric diS tilt banco, ordol' to o'ttlblish the foundatIOns of deney to bring about lIrepetllion of the 000,000. aspemting point, Not oven \to bo Ot' vibratIOn, Pl'of, Olivel' J Lodgo tho ompil'e.\ 6t,lte o[ things which hindered the I continued\ at tho end of it, The pllper has tried to produco ltght by dtrect Tho oath WtlS reafilrmed Octobet' 12, French from realizing ttlC full SUjlet'l- GUOVER CLEVELAND is worth about a was torn aoross and 1 was torn With eloctric action Without tho lIltorven- 1881, and the year 18DO IS fixed as the ol'ity of tho Chasse pot dUl'lIlg thell' quurtel' of a million. That IS the esti- anxiety to know Just holY the agent tion of beat. BV means of oscillatlllg tuue for lumttllg tho Impcl'lltl Ill'CI'Og- last Wat' \\ ith GCt'm,tlly. At the com- mate of a well advised porsonal friend. got in and how she won my confidence discharge of a Leyden jar, giving as' ative, forming t\\O houscs of parliar mencoment of that wtlr thollsands of Ho hlld something liko $100,000 whon The woek after that I wasn'tathome much as 1,000,000,000 completo vlbl'a- ment, and tlansforming the govern- the Froneh troops did not even know ho became Prosident. Ho hlld pll1ctlCed much. House.cleaning- time is popu- tlOns pel' second, he obtallled electrIC ment into a constitutlOlIIll mOlHll'chy, how to lire thoil' Ilew rtfles, ,lIld IH~d law profitably for many years, had helc1 larly supposod to be tho most tl'ymg waves th,ll WOlO essentially light in The Emperol\s C,\pitttl was ch,Ulged to ask for inst\'ttctlons on the lucrative office of sheriff in Bulfalo, period of lifo for the uufortunate man every particulal' oxcopt they \I ere too fl'om Kioto to Y cddo, which was 1'0- that subject, In the present CltSe the h,1\1 ltved well within his income while I of tho family, I, of oourse, try to long to alIeet a rctllla. To accomp11sh II IlIue<1 , and c,llled To~io. dangm' is accontlHltod by tho Issue of II Uovel'nol', and had Invested his savings a,(oid the dwelling then as much as tho lattet' the waves bad to bo short- Feudalism, or tho holdlllg of fiefs by new regulatIOn forbiddlllg mon to take cumulatively. During his foul' years I possible; but, in my opinion, house ened from a longth of throe yards to the daimio, came to an ond 111 1871, by into account eithor tho smoke 01' the nt Washington these investmonts will oleaning isn'l, a circumstance to the the hundrod-thottsal!(Uh of lIlI inch. imperml edict, ami the wholo of great noise in a battle. 1'1115 IS, of cotll'se, have increased to about $150,000. He I tomato-canning struggle. Tho~ tho Whon wo aro able to gencl',tte olectl'IC Jtlpan W,IS again directly under tho on lIceount of the new smokeless rtllo. let.tins about half his l'residentiul sal- place tltlrcs on a fearful und sangulllary waves of thc noc~ssat'Y, smtll~lIess, the I l\1!I~ado's rule , , , Tho pOSitIOn of Illlllrt.y on tho dcfen- al'y of ~;jO 000 a Jeur appeltrllllCe, There is to me somothing pre~ent .wasteful ,lI1d clull1sJ s:lstellls lhe titles of kuzo lind dalmlO wero sive,lntherto betr,lycd by 1I clou<1 of \ appalling in the sight of the womall of of !tghtlllg by tho help of steam en- also abollshed, both belllg re-nllmod smoko, Will honceforth romain undis- A NEW BRUNSWICK mechanio in tbe houso with sleev(js rollod up to the gines and dynamos will bc qmcldy simply Ku,lsoktt (]luo-as-ll-!..oO), 01' olosed to the assailants, and tho }irac- search of wol'le, died in Boston. The elbow and the formorly fait, arms drip- abandoned.-Arkllilsaw Traveler. noble familit's. The dlstmctions be- tico of foroing the onemy to deploy by body was placod in an expensivo casket ping with tho crimson goro of tho ..... tweon the lower ordel's of peoplo 11'01'0 a firo ftom It gt'eat dtstanco Will Imvo by a benovolent society lind forwarded slaughtereel tOIl1,ltO. Tho house reeks -1\11', Palmor, II Pittsburgh nattlt'al sc,lttol'cd to tho wlIIds, and ovon tho to bo abandoned, The more the at- \VHOLE NO. 240. FULL FO FUN. -Waiter-\~lr. Pepsino Is dainty about his eatin9,\ Head'Vatter-\1! he an epicure?\ 'Vaitor-\Xo. he's 0 !lyspeptic, \-CltICrt10 Globe. -lhcon (to IIlrs. Parl'onu)-\Did you seo tho av,llanchcs in Switzor- land?\ IIlI's P,It'\ onu-\Oh yes: bu' I novcr mix With such low society.\- ~func. -Up-lUver Politician-\Are you goin' to the C,\tiCUS to-night. .Jim?\ Jim-\Don't b'licvo IwM!. I loft my rovolvel' at tho gunsmith's to be fixed, and ho says bo can't touch it until nex' 1\ eek, \-Epoch. -A P,lriS firm has produced porous glass fOI' window panes to assist venti- latIOn, Porous plastc,,\ are said to be good for bodily pains, but whether por- ous gl,\ss is good [or window panos· remains to bo deterlOlUcd.-Nor1'1stown llerald, -1'>1erchnnt-\What do you mean by using such languago? At·o you the boss hot·o, or am 1 tho boss?\ Clerk- \I lenow I'm not tho boss,\ 1'>1orchant- \Then If you are not the b03s, why do you talk ltko a blamod fool?\- Slfll1/(/~, -Wlfo-\Why John, what made you get such a little umbrella with so much handlo?\ Husband-\That han· <Ho's solid silvel'.\ Wlfe-\Yos bul you can't put tho handlo up when it rU1l1B.\ Husband-\Well I'd like to know if I dtdn't put it up [or $5 during thA last wet spellP\- IVashlllgtoli CII/Le. -\Ycs said tho [t'tIit man at the cornet', rcgretfully, \I'm gettin' old. ] can't sco us well as I used to. \Vhen] 501111 pouUll of grapes to a man that's in a 'm'ry, I sometuucs gits 111 a ripe bunch by mist,lke n And the old mall sighed dbmally,-CluC!fgo Trlbunc. -'Ylfo-\I was so amusod to-day, ,John, I was sittmg in the Eden 1\1usca, and was actually t,lkcn for ona of the figures by an old l,ldy. It was too funny\ lIusbaud-\IL1 ha ha! It I1lU\t hn.\'o bccn 'Ylwro\ ore you sit· ting', my de,tt', in tho Challlber of HoI\ ror\'''-N. }\ WO//d. -l\Iagistrate (absent-mindedly, tel PI'lsonor)-\Stand up! You he reb,)' sololllnly del'laro, in tho presenoe 01 these witne\\es, that you will love, chorish aud protect tillS woman untll de,lth do you pat't.\ Pl'lsoner (badll ft'tghtenod)-\Wlm-wlmt's that, ~or lIonor?\ l\fdgtstr,tte (rousing himself) -\Oh I beg pardon! It', ten dollars 01 thirty days \-Life. -Ang-el Ohild (to distant relative, who IS dit1lng With the fa11111y)-\Say. I got sometllln' for you, U ncle Josiah. Hero it b,\ Distant Helati,'e-\l>Iy good !tUlo mall, why do you suppose 1 W,tIlt that box of bhtcklllg?\ Angel Child-\lII knOllS.\ 1'>1other-\No don't, my dem,,\ AngelOlnld-\'Yllll dl<ln't you say Uncle Josi,lh hadn't any po11sh ?-.1mcllca. -1'>1ISS Virginia Tone, the heiress- \1111' Flious, 1 am uttorly astolllshed, not to S,ty shocked, at ) our proposal. Tho Ide,t of my marrying you is tho most deliclOusly-absUt'd thing I hal'O heard, Perhaps you aro not awaro that I bolong to tho F. F. V, 's?\ 1\1r, Flicu.-\The live foolbh vil'glns? I was awaro, 1\l!ss Yirgtlll,I, that you had passed tho pot'lOd of guldy girlhood, but I had no idelt that you datod so far back as that, \-1'.;rrc lllll/te Express. -\Is tho editor-lIl-ehief 111?\ askod a stranger, as he sauntered into the city roportor's room at Clg'ht o'clock in tho mot ning, \No sir,\ repliod the Jttllitot', kindly; \he docs not oomo down so earl.v. 1. thoro any thing I can do for you'\ \Perhaps so. AI'e you connocted With tho pootical de- partmont of the paper?\ \I am, sit',\ \0 what do you do?\ \I empty thli wltsto·b,lskets, sir.\ A DE:.SPERATE FLIRT. IIow 110 Actotl nllrll1~ II Ylslt to 1\ Soc- olld·ChlS!i llimo I\lllseuJll. They had )ust como out of 11 dimo museum-a t,lll, I,mk womall With klllfe-bl,ulo lips !lI1(l all ohvo gl'oen compleXIOn; the ltttlo old mall with hOI' \I as round-faced blue-oycd lind meck of m,tnllOI' II,ll'dly had they I'oached tho pavement \I hOll the os- bon co of vltlegat' by his Side hissed o~t. \I seon ye, Abs'lom Ktttson,\ \Seen me wItat, Nancy?\ \Oh I'd ask\ hat! I tell ye I seen ye \\ ith my own ltvin' eyes!\ \Seon me wh,lt?\ \Scon you Ilttl·tt~ill' \ith that tattood woman Oh, I dtd'\ \GoOll Lord, Nallcy!\ \Oh I oeell ~ Oll give hoI' them pen. Iluts. I SOOIl ) 0'\ \'Vhy Nance, I-\ \And I soen yo lIurrttin' with tho fat WOnl<lII, I lice 11 ~o gtVO hOt' tho apple, Ab. Ktt tSOIl,\ \Why Nance, I IDurely-\ \I had my eye on J'1, I seon yo offor that albillo g,tl a bito of your bolony s,\Solllger, Ab Kittson; un' I socn y() try to llutlm up to tl1.l' bearded WOlll- a11-\ ID tho man's home. At New Brunswiok With the ouor of boiling tomatoes, glls expert, has mad3 tho calculatIOn despised Otttc,tsts lI'ero m,tde citlzons, I tacking party marchos in serried ranks Lhe Collector of Customs demanded $10 Hows of gt'im bluebeard jars stand on thtlt each day 600,000,OUO cubto [eet of I pl'otected by 1,IW, and tho quickor it advances ujlon the [lutyon the casket, and as the fdends the shelvos ot this vegeturian butch- IHttul'lIl gas arc drawn fl'om tho 1.>011 cis Tho degl'ees in rank muong the onomy tho moro [o,ll'ful will be tho of the deceased wero nnable to pay, he my, lind othot's ompty yllwn fOI' blood of the earth fot' uso in that CIty. 'Ihis Japllnose are now as follows: loss os in!lictod upon it by the \Illlstbio hold tho caskot and its contonts for \In btteh l~ placo as tillS and at such amount wOlghs ovor 12,000,000 pounds, Filst, Tho Emporol' and tho royal foe. These aro very momelltous several days. A ohoap wooden coffin an hOUl',\ it is just as well fOI' tho in- of which 8,000,000 I ounds lH carbon, famihes changes, amountlllg, m fact, to a rCI'o- . I' t I to l- eo l1 IV Iy i\! I' In I' 1'5 of tllO 0Pl'l Ion tll,tt IVI'tll Seoond, The Koosoku, tlto noble lution in the modern urt of \I lit', Bllt 11 ,IS Imully purchased by the friends of slglll to In lIIall ]>ot\OI , a I 1', ,I leI , , the plan of malung Frellch soldtol'S I \Good land of-\ Lhe deceased ami the l'elll\lnS '''ero ftom hOlllo [II tho he.,t of Iha edt'n,lg-e the 1Ilthdwwal of so much mtltmi1tl, families, Ollrry their old rlllcs whtle thoy goo I \Shot u]1, Ab i~lttson, 01' I'll (ro '\ \ I I 1 f tIll \t I t + tl 11' AI' .1\ Thil'll Tho Shizoku, the gentry. tllken mvay ami buriod. The Collectods t \0 ,t(.Y a Itl lOll\ (Oe\ll v,ln .0 Home Hllg 'II glve way. toau,,, . 0\(\ tlto be,1 il'leW] fllllJ h,13 Oil \J,tl'l\ _ \litt'{J tho dovCllopllll)ut of natural g,tS FO\ll,th. Tlte }founitl, lhe citlzells in '1IlWIlIT(1l'ilUl'UBflCond-jJnndctlsltctl'hQIIP. I) I, J 1 11 t (.,'. Jioclllet/ Vf tJl 1l!lIl'h k li1 hOI' 1Il'~IJl1II'l, I in Wo;;tQl'11 olln~ylvnlll~t-, tuQI'Q lU,VQ genel'a.- (( I ' '1'1.1,1- 1,1\; 'Jlhhl,U rlJ.t\i!'lli\l!t.t \\lf~ ltl 1 1 )1.'\':1 M\\\'l'I\J \ijhl\k\l~ H/c/wiaB, • through movomenl~ uppropl'i,tto only I home! A-Iltu'ltlin '''Itll ~lCh! Oh, 1 to tllo now arm ('!tn onl\' lelld to CO/l\ , oeell ~ Oll, ~ ou mlnablo bili UtI'I'ut ~'()u!\ rll~loll, --lJol/Clo'~ C'C)ltl't JUll/'IW{, .-Dell Olt ~'nG I', (SO •