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The Roslyn news. (Roslyn, Queens County, N.Y.) 1878-current, July 13, 1878, Image 1

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tob scBQoj^amb, 6onie, tireilejes ! nptilra your tcniicr light, And Ictus read to deptlisof changing blue, The winged thoughts that waver through ■ ’ and thiongh Those mystic mirrors, if I read aright, Reflect no lessons such aa books recite, ■ $tlt Catehthe ^libtler secrets that UMlide Tlljr woman ’ s jieart ;r-making lw>th fa] ... and true , ’ In one deft-woven tapestry nnite. In what old picture wonldat ttiou flttOTt stand? Haply as sweet Vlr^nla^when through ways '•. Of crowd and jostle oft I see thee come — ' VIrginia with her tablets in her hand, — • Ere Appfoistoigbts her with his ruffian gaeq, Tripping across the forum of Old Rome fAt>M 0# fMk fJsMiBLE FIRE. i will tell you the tale of the terrible fire ; It springs from the earth — It is dreadful and dire. - , In the dark Wiiitryfik; tipwardfly; See it grow In He frame — See It glow Into flame ! See it burning and blazing ; Seq it spring into life With a vigor a marihg ^ How it longs for the strife ! Hear the noise and the rattle — How it swells, how it grows, liike the crash of a battle, Like the clash of the foes ! See It rushing and rising aiid roaring, See it trying to touch a tall star ; It seems in the sky to be soaring f.TLike a flag of fierce flame from afar. See it turning and burning and braving — See it streamings and gleaming and red I Ah! the smoke in the air now is waving Like a winding-sheet of dull lead. Hear H laugh with wild glee at each futile en ­ deavor • To quench or to quell its exuberant force ; It is flaming and. free and fantastic forever ; It delights and, exults with no pang of re ­ morse, ♦ With no pain, with but pasBion — mad passion It quivers With its pennon of scarlet, the bloodiesthue, With its gleaming streams and its roaring rivers, It dares to do all thlnga'that flame dares to do. How it darts, how it dances and dashes, As though it had taken for aim, To reduce all the world Into ashes And to fling all the stars into flume ! It is glittering and glowing and glaring — And raging it rings its own knell ; It is showing its wonderful daring — It is turning the sky into hell ! V How it lazily lingers . With its swell and its fall ; With Its fiery fingers Weirdly waving a pail ; WithlbB horrible hisses, Like the wind in a storm ; With its blistering kisses, On face afad on form ! . ^ y Of Its flashes ^ Bereft, Only ashes Are left ; TUI Its cries Tell its doom — . Anditdiea In the gloom. * * . : -:r imvetowyoatJirfrte'orttie terHblb me t It has sung its last song to Its itbninoua lyre — It has sung its lasf songnnias breathed its lost breath, . It has lived wlthodl; life, It hu died without death. The Jersey Giant. This story is not going to begin by saying, “ Once upon a time. ” Why.will people always say, “ Once upon a,time, and make the story seem ever so old ? Just as if you and I and all the other children did'not know that there are giants nowadays in the woods, and little faries keeping house in the beds of vio- ; lets, and good spirits living in the bright places where the sun shines, and bad spirits shut up in the dark holes in the trees, so thot they can ’ t get out at the children 1 Dear me I We are not so young ns they take us to be, are we ? So, when I tell you that this giant lived in New Jersey, not a hundred miles from New York, and that what I am going to tell you happened only last summer, you and I know that it might easily be so, and we shall hot mind the wise looks of these older people who think it is all foolishness. Let me say another thing — that this story is told for boys and girls, and I have no time to write it so that grown people can easily understand it. If they find ’ any long words of which tliey do not know the moaning, why, they fj'can ask the children to explain them. The boy who sow this giant was little Tommy Bento, who will tell you all about it if you ever meet him. He lives in New York; in a four-story brown- stone house near Fifth avenue, and goes to Dr. Syntax ’ s school, ou the comer of Tbingemmie street and Wautdyuknlt avenue. So if you wnut to ’ know from | his own lips whether this story is true, it will bo easy for you to find him. Tommy and his mother were staying at the sea side, and lie was having a good time, I can tell you. He Was eight years old, and there were ether boys there just of his age. I never knew boys just eight years old to fail to have a ; .red time. They were staying in a handsome hotel on 'the Jersey shore, a long way below Long Briinch, where they could look right out of their windows over 'the ooean and see the stately white sails moving to and fro, and the liawki durt- jug at the waves for fish, and could bear, day and night, the roar of tba surf on the beach. There were four great pleas- , ure9 » au» We for Tommy Bento and his little friends — eating, stooping/haUi- tag, and pining on the beach. And the greatest of these was eating for the appetite of uu eight-year-olTtajy ta his vacation and at the sea-side is one of the wonders of the world. One day, after dinner, Tommy took DEVOTED TO THE INTERESTS THE TOWN OF NORTH HEMPSTEAD VOL. I. ROSLYN, QUEENS COUNTY, N.i Y., SATURDAY, JULY 13, 1878. NO. 15. WIT A SH W ISDOM. , — When one rellootn that •IMiMlfttea will only weigh a pound, ho cannot help seeing what a goneretta provider Stettat Nature in. — Before any young men fight a duel let them remember the words of Pnblius Syrtis : No man ever lost Ilia honor save him who had it nnk — There are some men who n« busy in idleuesa and, make the leisure of peace not only more timiblesome. bnt even more wicked than , the bnataess of war. 1 . sand man ” of him. Making A satid ifian of anybody was to shovel sand on him Until he was pretty nearly covered. They usually stopped before they got the sand heaped up to his neck. I don ’ t hellfeVU anybody but boys woiild ever pliiy snob a game ; but they played it, and liked it. So Tommy sat down, and they began to shovel the sand on his fat little legs. » After a while he thought it was time to go .back to the hotel, but somehow it seemed a long way off, and the farther he walked, the farther it was away. Now it moved off lo one side, and then behind him, and then suddenly it was gone. But he did not feel afraid, though he did not know why, and ho kept on walking because ho knew he must come to something. feoon he did, sure enough. He sa giSlk st before him what he thought was iPsp tree -oa tall as the house he lived in in New York; but suddenly the top of the tree began to. whistle; and made such a wind that Tommy ’ s sailor hat blew off. Tommy tried to nui, but he couldn ’ t move, he was so frightened. But the whistle sounded very gooil-humored, and Tommy remembered that he had never seen any body whistle a jolly tune because he was angry. It would be a good time to to this great creature, but bow was it to be done? Tommy wished for his Christmas horn ; he wished for, a telephone ; he wished for a big pair of lungs ; but wishing brought none of them. At lust he walked boldly up to the big man, and, standing by his shoe, took hold of the hem of his trousers, and pulled very hard. Then the giant felt him, and picked him up with a great hand, and looked at him. And when the giant Uad asked Tommy all about him ­ self, Tommy took courage aud said, “ And who are you ? ” , “ Oh, ” said the mau, “ I ’ m the Jersey J3iant. ” So Tommy went, on the Jersey Giant's shoulder, to the place where the Jersey Giant lived. They went with such strides that Tommy thought sometimes he should certainly be whirled off the giant ’ s shoulder. They came at last to a house so.high that Tommy couldn ’ t see the top of it, where the giant took Tommy ’ s breath away by suddenly sitting down on a bench outside the door. You can imagine to yourself how Tommy felt, if you suppose tjmt you woro on the roof of a house, and the house suddenly sat down. Presently the giant aaid, “ It ’ s time to go and dig the dinner, ” “ To do what? ” cried Tommy, in amazement. To dig the dinner I ” roared the giant, ta a voice that frightened the little fellow into silence. “ Come and see the farm, ” the giant roared again. \ There ’ s such cooking done any where else in this country, ” . - “ ‘ Dig the dinner I ’ — ‘ cooking I ’ — ‘ on form I ’ What does he mean ? ” thought Tommy; but ho did not dare to ask. The giant put Tommy ou his shoulder again, and away they went. “ I think that minoe-pio must bo ripe,\ said the giant. “ What l ” shrieked Tommy, right into the giant ’ s ear; for he sat close it. e (?tk and evidently prided himself very touch on his appearance. The roast beef, the giant said, they would get at the beef garden near the house, but now they must look after the Vegetables. So he dug up a few boiled potatoes that WcfS about as big as pump ­ kins, ‘ -and pulled some smoking hot ears of corn off. of some stalks that were as tall as the trees Tommy was used to, and pulled up some parsnips that fell apart in slices as soon as they came up, and showed that each slice was nicely fried ; then he picked some baked apples from one tree and some pickled poaches from another. by his shovel and his little pail, and ___ down to the beach to dig in the sand. B RJ “ ACu painted on It, but oi course that did not mean that the pail was n good boy; that toy to sit down in the sand, rest hie and let U mju “ lanke » ‘ I say minqe-pie must be ripe, and re going out to the patch to see. ” Cooking I — on n farm ! — digging the dinner ! — mince-pie patoh !• Tommy was so astonished that he could not ujter a wprd. And sure enough they came to a garden patch of mince-pie ; the crust was turning a rich brown under the sun, and the edges wore all scalloped just as they are on the piea.ut home. The giant took down a silver spado that hung on a tree near at hand — which Tommy noticed was fnibpf jolly torts just,ripening, and had two or three kinds* of enke grafted on it besides — and out out a big piece of the pie; ho said the glass wagon would come along and get it. But before ho went on he pulled a raisin out of the pie and gave it to Tommy to eat ; it was as big as Tommy ’ s fist. “ I ’ m taking the wrong end of my din ­ ner first, ” said the giant : “ wo ’ ll go and sae how the soup tastes. I haven ’ t look ­ ed after the soups this year as I ought to have done, and I ’ m afraid the crop is going to be poor. ” A crop of soups I How queer, Tommy thought, hut hodid not dflre to ask any more questions. Beally I ’ m a little afraid to toll you all the strange things Tommy saw, because you may think this story is not true. But where do yon think they found the sonpa ? In big reservoirs like that on Fifth avenue, and each reservoir held a different litad of soup. The reservoir nearest to them held black bean soup, and very black it luoked ; aiid tb'e next held pea soup, which ’ was, of a pretty dark green ; and the one beyond was of Igmato soup) aud very red and bright it AH the reservoirs were of the most beautiful china ; each was a quarter oi a mile long and a quarter of a mile wide, and eoeh of them was aa oloau os one of your mother ’ s plates. “ Now for the fish,\ said the giant, and he stepped ever to a pond, where they had no sooner appeared than the came swimming up to the shore. Aoxioufl to be c&ught, and what is more, they were all cooked. Wben Toamiy looked closer he saw that what be hsd thought to be the water they wtw awimining lit • lake of sauoe. Finally the giant picked out* iluMk .wss ui&sly cooked and beautifully, trimmed with iiam end alioM «| hetd-boiled Then, after he had got half a dozen Charlotte-Busses from the hot-house, he said, “ Now we ’ ll go to the ice-cream pond ! ” “ To the what? ” aoreamedTom ­ my into the giant ’ s ear, blit ho was told to wait and see. Presently they found a boot and* got ta. They soiled . along till they came to what seemed to Tommy toffee great icebergs of all sorts of colors ; some were white and some pink and' green, and some were a hundred feet high. ; It kept growing colder and colder, and poor Tommy shivered very much. Meanwhile the giant was getting very angry, and at last ho broke out into a roar — “ Where's that chocolate cream ? ” Then Tommy knew that all these ice­ bergs were made of ioo-cream, and it seemed so funny that he could not help laughing, though the giant ’ s anger frightened him. At that the, giant was still more vexed, and said that Tommy shouldn ’ t have any ioereream at dinn er But the list of places where they went is getting too long. There was a sugar barn, whore they got sugar for the giant ’ s coffee, where there were great bins of brown sugar with wooden shovels in them, and great bins of white sugar with silver shovels in them — sugar, sugar, every wliero. There were big oribs of macaroni ; the places whore they kept the pepper were shaped like big pepper cruets, and were half as high as the sugar barn ; there were bonbon bushes, on whioh the candy grew in beantiful little boxes, each ono tied up with a pretty ribbon ; there were bushes- filled with nuts, each bunch of a different kind, and on each bunch there grew a little nut ­ cracker. There was a kuifo andj^ork tree too, that boro knives aud forks of all kinds and sizes ; and there was a spoon buiih, so full thnt.when the wind swayed it all the spoone tinkled together. Whenever the giant needed 9 new knife or spoon, you see, he only had to pick one. There wore plants whose oup-like flowers were filled with strawberry join there were garden patches of all kinds of pie, and a big tank of apple sauce ; there were gum-drop vines ; whole fields full of bread growing on stalks, and half a dozen little orolmrds ofidifferent kinds of coke, and a great many other thinga about which there is no space to toll you. At last they sat down to dinner ; the giant sat on a chair, and Tommy sat on n thick piece of bread'on the table. He watched the dinner all through, mid made up bis mind that the Jersey Giant was 0 greedy old fellow. Tommy won ­ dered whether other people ate as much in proportion to their size. Buthe wasn ’ t frightened until a big bowl was put upon the iable ; when lie got up mid looked over the rim, wlmt do you suppose he saw ? _W.hy, water-melons bobbing around ta the milk like huckleberries in your bowl of milk ! When the giant lifted up a spoou that had two or three water-mol- ous in it, and opened his month — Tommy never'knew what followed, but suddenly ho found himself sitting in the sand on the beach just where he was before he started. He picked up his shovel and little pail, and Sot out as fust hs his little legs would carry him for the hotel. When ho had told his mother ajj about it she looked rather grave, and, to Tommy ’ s astonishment, asked him what he ate for dinner. About the same no he always had, he said, and this was about tlie sanae nu'lie always bad : he had had two plates of soup and two piecss of fish ; he had had roast beef and roast lamb, roast duck and roast chicken ; ho had hud potatoes, tomatoes' turnips, parsnips, corn, encumbers, pickles, and ohowohow. It was a terrible list, for tins wasn't half of it. Tommy didn't think, of course, for, after he had answered all his mother ’ s questions, he said that lid would have eaten a heartier dinner if he had been really hungry. Mm. Bento; had to find out all these things from Tommy himself, because the rules of the hotel did not allow children to eat their meals at the same time with the grown-up people, and ho tliereforo took hia at unreasonable hours, with servants for compuny. Mrs. Bento insisted on changing all this, and Tommy diue4 after that with his mother. And now How Popular Songs ore Written. Dexter Snutiji had written a number of clever verses, winch he carried to hie publisher. TliM gentleman, after glanc ­ ing them over, bumli'tl them back, with the following doubtful criticism ; * ’ Those ate very good; |Mr. Smith — too good, in fact. Yes ) tli^y are too good for me. Use them in the Atluntvt, or some such place. What 1 want just now is some­ thing after thie pattoru.\ And he read to the astonished writer some selections from several if the popular ballads. Smith was disgusted. \It surely can't be possible, ” said, ho, “ that the public wants such mlfesreblo stuff as this.\ “ It is not only posijjble, but true.\ “ Then I don't wonder'fbat mine ia too good for youriifio. .Goalday!\ Andthoyoitag composer half angrily strode out of the office, reflecting upon the. degeneracy of the public nund| He was going along one of the narrow BpsUm streets, absorbed in his thoughtf, when he heard a dirty little nrohta yeflto his mother, \ Ha-ay, mam I Fnt inegn my little bed I\ There ArJ g > g home, filled tioii to write the most of dreariness ho could iposed the song which, has since mado|liim famous. His little joke was well rlooived, and its reputa ­ tion spread until the miles reached on enormous figure. In tins connection, let me give you the number of copies sold of a few of; the best kuowu publica ­ tions of this kiiid : “ Put mo iu'my little bed, ” by Dextof Bmitli, 250,000; “ Mol- lie Darling, ” I>y Will'S. Hays, 40,000; “ Silver threads among the gold, ” by “ Danks, ” (wh^ ia very popular) 75,000; “ Come home, father,\ 50,000; \ Evan ­ geline, ” 25,000;* “ Tramp, tramp, tramp, ” 100,000; “ Natali O ’ Neill, ’ , ’ 100,000; “ Sweet Genevieve,\ 20,000. Many of these still sell steadily, and- will doubt ­ less continue to do so for n number of years. Bongs written to suit the times frequently roach immeuso sales, and as in book (publications, .those whioh ap ­ pear the weakest are not infrequently the most eucoeaiful. THE FARM AND GAUHEN. OROn&BD AND NOItSimV. was hislubjeo with a determi unutterable m think of, ho A I*lac| for Bachelors, Thibet is the|old bachelor's paradise, for it is there t|at ho can flirt with a hundred girls Isimulbuicously, and got married without knowing it. T. T. Cooper, an agetit in the English civil I are hilled by diistUig limp,* ashes, or Care toith Early Fruit is quite essential to success, and neat packing are found to bo aa important with this as with any other fruit. The time when one would fill n wagon body with Early Harvest or Sweet Bough apples, ppt in a shovel and half-biffiWI'ineiumro, go to the nonrest village and\ shovel up his fruit, has gone by. It pnya to select the fruit, pack it ta paper-lined now half barrela, or ta baakets or orates, and put it upon tbo market as carefully aa if it wore pears or poaches. Thus treated, summer apples pay, aa some growers know to their profit. Early Fear's come to miiturity rnpidly, and if. not gathered 44, time, mitay arc apt to rot at the care. Heloetion and neat packing pay. with .these. Thinning Fruit, however thoroughly it may have boon done early in- the season, will still need attention, and any excess may still bo removed. Young 7Vre«. — Mnoh ' pruning may bo avoided by occasionally flinching thu yonng growth, aud removing entirely shoots that start where hrniiohes arc not heeded. fj* __ ' - Blight ,— Wo know nothing of \this mysterious malady until the fatal blow hoa fallen. Out away the blighted twig,, branch, or tree, book to Hound wood, and ns a precaution, burn tire dead primings. Insect a . — It is not pmotimbie-to re ­ peat every month mid every year the whole insect story. In brief: Borers show tliomsolveH by “ saw-duat,\ by gum, and by a flattened dead-looking place on the bark. Out out or probe With wire 4 .,. The peach-borer ia to be sought for just at or below the mirfiieo ; the insect Juya ila egga from now until antuuiu, A small mound of ooal-mihea around tlie treeii has been found iiHoful . ( 'odllny Moth, -,-1'iek up aud feed to pigs all faileu fruit, or keep pigs in the orehuid. . Examine weekly the traps, whether of cloth or hay-bauds, and kill those that have hidden there. Cloth traps may lie run through an old elothos-wriiigor, .. .Afue/s, on pear, cherry, and other trees — little dark- green, slow-moving, slimy creatures — A Itextei'ons Manipulator. 1 think Zephnnish Ham mnat have seiwiee — ho w(i| reMjent:ly murdered at. Bhamo, although that is neither hero nor there — resolved to travel through China by a route comparatively un ­ known, and full of dangers. Blurting from Hadow, ho wont along the Yuiig- tse-Kiang toEasterii Thibet. One day ho found himself in a grove, surrounded by a group of girls, and, according to him, \ the whole soono was so Arcadian, and the romantic offset bo irresistible, that, though striiek by the remarkable absence of the male sex, lie gave himself up to the tailuouoo of tlie situnlion, and waited with languid curiosity for the denouement of this pleminut little ad ­ venture. \ JIo smoked with tlie girls aud shared their meals, and afterward they dragged in a young girl of sixteen, at ­ tired in a silk dices, seated her by his side, and then began to danco round the; pair. He could not make it out until his servant explained that, ucoording to one of the customs of Thibet, ho had, without knowing it, allowed himself to ho married. Heat first wished to resist, pleading Englisii customs, but the tribe among whom he was would accept no ex ­ planations, and ho was oompollod to take the girl with him; and then she wouldsay stdinupr, \Take care, ..Tommy, or you'l|. ; aee;Ute Jersey Giant.\ Tommy can ’ t understand how thatoau be, for he feels sure the Jersey Giant is a real man and nota bad dream. But his mother always smiles when he tells her that he knows just : where the Jersey Giant lives. — Nazar. -A young man objected to the yonng girl, that his rich old uncle .wished him to marry. “ You mustn ’ t be so particu ­ lar,\ said the exasperated miete. “ I tell you site's well enough.\ “ 80 she is, uncle,** responded the nephew, “ mid you know you've always taught me to leave well enough alone ? ” — The end of the world to now dm finitely fixed for 18»ti. ■ She Knew Her Biiflliinss. The Detroit Fray Press Bays When Collins went home to dinner Monday ho found the house toiiaiitlesH, the coon- stove cold, and there was a lonesome look about that part of the Monday washing still loft in the tuhn in tlie sum- mer-kitoken. Hurrying through to tlie back yard ho saw his wife braced against the fence, holding to the end of a brfikon clothes-line to keep the newly-washed garments from the ground, “ You ’ ve got hi re at last, have you ! ’ ’ exclaimed the wife, as she caught sight of him. ” \ Yes, I!m hero — what ’ s the waiter ?\ he repeated. “ HereTve been holding thia broken line for over an hour — over a full hour, sir I ” she snapped. “ I was determined to die'right here before I ’ d let these clothes-down ! ’ ’ “ But why didn ’ t you call Some one? ” he innocently inquired. “ There's that new family next door — the woman would have come over iu one minute.\ “ Woman next door, you big idiot, you ! Hasn't siie been peeking around mid peeking around for two weeks to my wash, and d ’ ye think I ’ d give her a obauoe to come over here ami see for herself whether the aleeves of my night ­ gown were pieced down with unbleached cotton 1 You don ’ t know anything, sir, and you moke tracks for a piece of rope, sir I ” Well, 1 swan 1 ” growled Collins as' ha “ tracked. ” — Little John is visiting his .grand ­ father. This is an extract from a letter to his mother: “ Fototer-bugs to plenty, an ’ I enjoy ’ em very much 'cause they makes graa ’ /ather swear an ’ every time ire Wes over he spill* hto false teeth, su' be always forgets Where he spills em ’ an' he hires us to roust ’ em out. uf to start a awlua shop, e, 'oauaait ’ Umakshim taw towbevis ’ eacha even flnojroad dust. > ^Lato, nests Tent Caterpillar, and those of the Fill 1(5-0- worm, now often abundant, must be destroyed wherever found. Black, Knot, often mistakenly Hiip- posod to bo the work of uu insect, should bo out out on its first appearance on pliitn and cherry trees. The Time for Jhutdiny varies with tlie locality. Oiiorries and plums are ready first, mid the pear next. The proper time is when well-formed buds may bo had, and tlie stocks are in grow ing condition, Bo that tlie bark readily parts from the wood. , I'HDir OAiiimw, Crape-vines. -TUu growth this year of the now vine being prAjianttory only, all that can be done is to cm'. Milage tlie produetioirof a single strong, vigorous oiiue. When the shoot luui reached, tlie top of the stake, let it hang over 11s it will. Keep tlie laterals pinched us llicro directed; pick off all beetles and cater ­ pillars, mid use sulphur freely if mildew uppcsili. OUl Yltu's need similar treatment us to laterals, insects, and mildew, (Jliiineo shoots often appear on tlie arms, or 'other parte of the old wood. If these are not wanted, rub them off at once. But it Houietimes happens that these come just whore wo would like to have a cane, to allow some change to be made in tbs training, Hiiclftss-to give ns a now arm to replace one Hint is millty ; in snob case we have only to encourage tlie new growth. Bummer Layering is nn easy and rapid method of propagating the vine, As soon us a shoot of tlie present season; in a convenient place, becomes hard enough to handle — recollect Unit they break with the greatest ease ut the nodes or joints-open a trench a few inches deep, and bury' a few joints, removing the loaves from the buried part of the shoot; put down a stake, and turn up and fasten the end of the ehoot to It, and treat this as if it were a young vino. In hot weather, and in light soil, it is well to lay a Hat stone over the buried part of tlie vine, to keep the place moist, BlankherrU ’ s and Raspberries', as all cultivators should know, have hlennfal atoms, ' The shoot wliieh grows this season will bear fruit next summer ; tlie sterns now bearing fruit will die in the full, to ho succeeded by those now green and growing. Growers differ us to tlie propriety of removing the stems us soon as the fruit is off, Homo preferring to leave them tiutll full, under tlie plea that they will help strengthen the root. As good cultivators sro equally divided ou this, both parties claiming Unit pmctlee warrants their view, we doubt if it is a matter of great importance, ami would follpw the most convenient course. New shoots, or canes for next yeur ’ e fruit, should bo cared for, and all that start, but are not needed, bo hoed up as weeds, Itsspberrioa msy bo stopped in their upward growth, by plnohing, when at three or four feet, and blackberries at fire or six fast. This pinching tire tops wiU ewiue side Uomehcs to grow. whiek are te be kept in control by plnohing when they have grown aa long a* heard tlie story of Undo Peter's Powder- horn. I-know he never read it, because reading woa not one of hia accomplish- monte. On a brisk, crisp winter's day, a party of men were assembled uroVmd the great box-stove in tho npiin office of Eastmaii'a Hotel, at Conway Comer (Hlintewque), telling stories, Peter Hines, nnr old jolly-faoed and genial-hearted stage- driver — then driving from Conway to Moridotli and Center Harbor — and told his wonderful story of tlie bear which ho encountered up at Bwift River Fall, ami the company wore laughing heartily, when Zephaninh Ham, a native of the soil, and nn entirely unique specimen of tho grams homo, offered to toll a story pu bis own aoouunt — to reluto a most wonderful ovout that enmo under hisoli sorvation. He was told to go ahead,ami ho wont on ns fellows : \Wal you. boo , Peter Hines aud me, a year ago last fall, hired old Alibot ’ i boss an' witgmi,.nn' sot out for Falls Pond, nrter trout. Afore wo started we got a couple of pint bottles of Hi, Ab ­ bot, and on the way up we stoppei) at old Parrish's, and got 'em filled with New Hum. Yon see I ’ anish wns town agent for Albany, and used to sell about us much liquor us would float a sohew- uor. \ Up the river we went — olear away up the Falls, where wo hitched the hose, and then got across tlie river ou some logs that had got jammed in Hie jaws of tlie Fails. At the pond wo faouud tho boat a great, fiat guudale -mid off we shoved, and began'to Hull, At fust we didn ’ t have very good luck, I ootoliod,- p ’ raps, luilf a dozen beauties store Pete hud a bite — O I you sliet up, Peter I Ymi know I ’ m tollin' it jest as 'twus, an ’ 1 don't wnut you to put in your ouiyiby- how. Well, geuis, I'sfeccoulilii't git *' 11 lute, so lie kept a pullin' awiiy at his flask ; tlie fust filing 1 knowed lin'd noin- plctely emptied it to tlie huil, drop. Ami thou iio wanted some of inliio ; but Igof my back up, ami told him 110 . Bays 1, 1 When diiiucr time oilmen, I'll give you jest a drop, but you s!mu'! guzzle 'it as you have yer own, ' * \ Wnl, Peter were lilml o' wrathful at that, and I Uuowed he ’ d a like to have throwed mo out o ’ tho boat of he'd a dared to a've done it. Howsumovur, pooty soon he had a rigid- smart bite, aud f Imd 0110 at the sanie tlmo, and aa wo was both a haulin'with all our might, 1 hit my bottle with my n!now,juid over- himrii it went I There wua nuire'u half a pint of prime old rum gone-to Jericho, and not another drop within six miles, if not more, “ What slioulil we do ? Ytm know what TIs up in that 'oro poml — iiaow eli. in- Uio water is. At ten feet deep you os 11 see tlm little fishes aud pelildes 011 tho Imltoin jest aa xihdn 1111 day, J n 'there we saw my Hack I O I my eyes ! didn't it loek tantalizin' ihiOwn lliur, so far liu- ynnt our roach, \ B'm by, nays Pete, says lie, ' Look here, Zepb., if you'll givu me half of that rum, I'll strip, and go down iui' a git it, ’ 1 ilidn ’ t bcliovo that htiooiiltl do it, blit 1 said Unit he might try, uuil if lie nmdoa siieeess, iuilf the rum should he ids. 1 Will, lie stripped 111 jest no time nt all, niul tailin ’ his own fiiislc in his luiud, down lie went. I wontlwml then wind hi! wanted his own Hush for, hntf foimdout soon enough, I luolind over, and send him go down, I semi him spank siilu 0 ’ my Ijnsk. aii ’ seed him pink it up, And thou wind, d ’ yo B'piiso lie did ? You ’ d never guess, of you should guess till doomsday. Wul I'll toll you and mind — I toll you it ’ s a fuel — e right iqi uu ’ down Hiduinn faot. Aud this was it, : “ Thar sot Old Pete Hines, Hat on tlis hol tom, imd he pulled tlie stopple out o ’ my Hindi wi'hfs teeth,an ’ then ho poured the ruin otiteo my llask into liis'ii ! Aud when lie conic up lie had tlie face ly de- uiand a full half of what lie ’ ll iett iu my flask ; uu' I imd to let him huvo it ; hut I jest rondo up my mind, eiul o ’ quiet liko, 'at that'd bo tlm last t iron I ’ d ever go anywhere a fisliln ’ , or anything else, with Peter nitres, ” Of cimi'se no 0110 disputed the truth of Zopluiniidi'H story. — It is getting so on Long Island, says an exchange, that if a wife hoa a strong© taste ta her month she at once jumps out doors and sereams, \ Preened by iny husband)\ — The mind is but a barren sett ; a noil which ia noon exhausted, end will produce 110 crop, or only ono, unless it bo oonttaually fertilized end enriched with foreign, matter. — A largo shingle mill wan burned ta Dubuque tlie other morning, and, do. ybu know, tour-fifths of the little foil™ iu tho town didn ’ t seem to feel a bit sorry about it, either. . - — Minialor — Jnnot ! Janet ! Drinking again! Don't yon know where all th® ilrtakcre go to? Jane — Ah could nn soy d'lmt itliern do, hut all know whore ah ken (hie) — got the heat ehenpest I — There in a time when men will not suffer had thinga heeauso tlirir oueeatora have suffered worse. There is n time when the hoary head of inveterate abuse will neither draw reverence nor obtain proteotimi. An orator, who was nuieh iu do- mimd iu political campaigns, being asked by an admirer Hie secret of Ida Hiiooeiw,, replied, \ Whim 1 have fuels, I give ’ em fads ; hut when 1 hayon ’ t, I yell aud saw tlie,air.\ - A yiiniig lady of a noighhbringtown ' awoke from a terrihln druatii ono night last week. Blio liml dronmed tliiit a young man with a soft heard was pleas ­ ing his fane , against, hern. When slm awoke slio'tonud it was only a oat. Then wasn ’ t nhuinnd ? New reotor to oleik — “ Do you think tlm oliiiioh-fills as well an fiirmmiy ?\ ,1 linos (olixiims to please) — \Lor hlesa you, sir, tlm utlier gent could not hold a ciiudlc to you. You olumld a ’ scon tlm piirapiiHtjiui run off my face on Himilay a-sliiiwin' of 'em into tlieir iieuisj ” — Uiiiatternrr-, \ ] teii — ytarT^my dour follow, I could li-aualato Virgil liucntly at the age of tun, \ Cliissical party — \ I lon ’ t lieliov.e it,\ H. (nxnileiity ),- — ’ What? You dii'i't? But I could, though just as well as I can now.\ 0. I ’ . — \ t believe that.\ \1 slioulil think glaatiuii would hft good for Msjor Brunck ’ s eyes,\ said one frieinl to aimtlicr, \ Oliuwcs are just what mo ruining them,\ was the reply, Tliul's queer,\ sail) the friend, “ Not at nil,\ was the rejoinder ; \because you see, ho only iison tho kind of glaases whioh are never raised above the noso.\ What's the nows? ” asked ail iao- luteil old lady of a passing stranger, who replied; \Well imtliiiig mucli,except that lying and chanting are still ta vogue.\ \Oh they're there, are they? Well, 1 hope they'll stay there, aud iiot come into this quiet neighborhood,\ said thu old lluiy. BipMionn, A Thief's Trick. ’ * 1 • •' ' A fasliloiiably-dreHred man went into a linge jewelry store in Bond Street, London, seieetoil srtieles wortli @1,000, and temiuroil a tiioiiniiud pound note iu payment, The storekeeper nseertiiiiiiid Hiat the liote wns a forgery. Just ss lie was about to summon nssfstaneu, a unb wns drawn rapidly up and two mcii id polioo iiulforin hurriedly entered, saying that tho man won an old offender iif whom tiiey were in searob, Dir, eiiiig a porter to plniM) tlm jowelry in lire cab and to come along with them os a wit ­ ness, the men in 11 uitem said they would inform His firm when their attenilanoti . wo|tld lie requiretl ta press the eliarge. Tiiitii tnoy drove off with tiiair prisoner, leaving the jewellers loud In their praise of the proftojciioy of till) poliee, Next day, however, their porter, brutally' beaten; returned with tfc iifferomtiaa that Hie two supposed poliee offioere were thieveo le disguise. Dipllieria, eommonly legnnlud ao a moihihi (Unease, is now drolared iiy some physicians to have lieon known in aneient Egypt, ft is said to have prevailed there aiid through Aula Minor for live ntuiles, anil to Imvo appeared in Hoiitliern Europe sSme 1,500 years ago. It wss litimvn iiy. Ha present name even thou, It rnged III Brolthernltaly in the arly part of Ilia fourth century, and long after In Holland and Fraiioe. It showed itself in this eoiiutry more than 100 years sinne, ami iius recently iieiui luonoimued opldemfu. tJertaiu authorities eonsliW it a inodlilcation.of the plague. Nothing liko a theory iu mediomo. An eirort will » Ini iniido, vvo iningiiio, to prove that all the I ’ toloinles ilicd of iliptliuria, and that Isis and Osiris were saved from it only Iiy tlieir divinity, A OI i I uohi ) tfeiieral. A Uhinesii Ociieml was sunt with an army uguiust n foree of bisurgiiuta who Imd repi-ntediy voiiqillsiiod the Iiuporiul troops, When his forces went into hat- lie, tlm General, a irotii of ferocious aa- peot and gigantic stature, Stationed him ­ self in tlie rear wiih a big club. He knocked down fugitive., after fugitive, imd swung his club with sueli effect that his frightened soldiers concluded Unit they would lie safer in the front, and made a headlong and sucueasful oharge upon the enemy. A Hlseovery* „ — About tSiree-fiftlm of tho jury trlsle iu thta country inolnd# at least one man on the jury who ought to have been born ajasulA . ' V . ’ . ' \ , r Wit is soroetiiiics better than argument, mid o story supplies tlie place of tha strongest logic, Two politicians were stumping tlie Htiite together, oaeli for his own election. One of them was u very mean roan and the other took ml- vantage of that fact and related a story which won him mow votes than the most eloquent periods could have done, “ My friends. ” tin Huld, four ancestors be- ileved that at tlie moment when a man idled aeliild was horn, and that the Mini of tire mini entered tire; body of the eliild. Now, I have nothing to aay nuaiiist my opponent except to state that lhave instituted a very careful inquiry imd liavo illsoovered that when he wau imru nobody diwl. ” Curiosity. Curiosity mnat bo gratlfled, though at times it is very expenslvo to do so, It frequently ulfiir etu,. however, In a good deal of taformation, Th# other t lifted up a beehive interesting little colony wei about twomtautee he had r itlMi it# D roatiou he wauted. JJ- hive seemed to have so# him, and ho iteelarea that moat telling auf bee in the to SW to - ' --- - .......................... another hire to the Mid of hi# dOffun

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