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Rural times. (Otego, N.Y.) 18??-1937, January 27, 1909, Image 2

Image and text provided by Otego Historical Association

Persistent link: http://nyshistoricnewspapers.org/lccn/sn84035818/1909-01-27/ed-1/seq-2/

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JOHNNY’S VACATION. Why Ho Wanted to Cut It Cliort and Returns Home. Jobnuy astonished the family in .the cocmtiy one day by announcing that he WMted to go home. ‘^Whait’is that?” demanded his father. **Want to go home?” I *TLep,” maintained the ,boy. ' \Well that’s very funny. It wasn’t two days ago that you were begging MS to stay up on this farm untii Octo­ ber, Are you sick?” \Got the blues?” \Nope.” \Toothache?” '‘Nope.'” \Mad because your mother won’t let you go swimming?” ‘‘Nope,” \Ah! I think I understand,” said his father, with a chuckle. ‘T happened to hear you sassing that farmer’s boy yesterday out back of the barn, and I also happened to see him flop you on your back. Did it hurt much?” \N-noi>e.” \Weil cheer up, my boy. We all have our ups and downs in this world. What good would it do you to go home?’ \If I was only home, pop,” replied the boy, with a longing sigh, “I could knock the stuffin’ out of Sammy Green, and then I’d feel better.”—A. B. liCwis In Bohemian Magazine. HER FtOW OF WIT. ery sweet to me, srs think it rasps While /peevish critics frequently Her voice Is ver. Though others 1 While/peevish cri _ _ ____ _ Complain'that she has little wit, I listen gladly and am stirred Most deeply by her every word. The-drama seldom is her theme. She wastes no time discussing art. The classic muse .she does not deem A fitting subject; biess her heart! From sconce she discreetly turns. And politics she sweetly spurns. Though others, think her dull, I sit And listen with siipreme delight. It seems to me her flow of wit Is always beautiful and bright. Her constant topic is, you see— Well, if I must admit it, me. —Chicago Record-Herald. A Narrow .Escape. I The Emperor's Style of Dust. ' There is a good story told of a Ger­ man driving an English friend from Prankfort to Homburg, when a motor car passed at a terrific pace, raising a cloud of dust. . \Ahr’ said the German. \There goes our emperor.” \How do you know?” inquired the Bn^shmah. \Do you suppose anybody else could raise a dust like that?” was th^ reply. —Yorkshire Post. j Grant's Little Story. General Fred Grant shows in a lit­ tle story bow a willing but prejudiced witness may confound hiihself. • \Any complaints, corporal ?” said the colonel, making one morning a personal in- ' spectioh, \Yes sir; Taste that, sir,’’. eaM the corporal promptly. .The.;C<flqj. iiel put the liquid to his lips. \Wliy.’f be sail, \that the best soup I ever tasted!” \Yes sir,” said the corporal, 'iand the cook wants to call it coffee.” I Not to Be ! Disturbed. \Sody crackers?- Yes’m,” said the country storekeeper. \I got ’em. I’ll —er—send ’em up to you.” ■\Well replied Mrs. Medders, \I did Tow to take ’em with me»” \Yes’m; but, you see, Bill Bruser he’s a-dozin’ on top o’ the bar’l jest now, an? he ain’t in the best o’ humor today.”—Philadelphia' Press. Miss. Brown Sings. \Won’t you sing something?” asked the hostess. \I rim afraid I can’t,” said Miss Brown. \Oh Miss Brown,’ said lady No. 1, ‘♦you know you have a perfectly charming voice.” \I?m all out of practice.” \Nonsense!” emphasized lady No. 2. “It’s lovely. You must sing.” \Yes you must;’! said the hostess. “Come no-w,” said lady No. 3, \be a dear, do! I’m just dying to hear you. I simply can’t wait.” \Somej other time.” \If you persist in* denying us all this pleasure,” broke in lady No. 4, \we shall never forgive, you./ I’ve just beeir l 0 j|iging to hear you. You simply. ' , From the New Primer, j See the wom-an. She has faint-ed. ; Why did the wom-an faint? She looked up sud-den-ly and saw •the beard-ed face of a' man with a ^leam-ing knife be-tween bis teeth. Was the man a-bout to harm the wom-an? Oh, no! He was eating pie with the knife.—Chicago News.' Cause of His Haste. Perambulating Pete—Wot is youse runnin’ fer, Mike? ' Meandering Mike—De, woman at de house back dere offered me a cake. Perambulating Pete—Well, wot wuz de matter wid it? Meandering Mike—Matter? Why, it wuz a cake uv soap.—St. Louis Pepub- lic. 1 The Desideratum. ‘T want an airship, hubby.” \What for?” \So we can look down on onr neigh­ bors.”—Philadelphia Press. -Harper’s Weekly. Origin of the Club Sandwich. - Alan'Johnstone Is | said to have origi­ nated the famous club i^ndwich, and the story runs that on going to the club one night between midnight and daybreak he found the'cafe closed, the cooks gone, and, being nearly famish­ ed, he invaded the larder, toasted him- i 'self some thick slices of bread, sliced them through, buttered them while • hot and laid thereon everything’ he found In the refrigerator—cqld chick­ en, ham and lettuce, with a spoonful of mayonnaise. The result was such an epicurean discovery as is not often made, but the story was too good to 'keep. He confided! the recipe to his cronies, and it straightway became ' one of the popular dishes of the club I menu, and so the father of the club sandwich, so deservedly popular, is the present British minister to Copen­ hagen.—Washington Herald. Circus Daring Due to , Heredity. Alfred T. Ringlihg says that nine- tenths of the leading performers be­ fore the public can be included in thirty families. As [sharply defined as any old English lineage, they can be traced backward in some instances more than two centuries, each genera­ tion accepting without question the. heritage of spangles and tights. The circus daring and the circus muscles and the circus restlessness have de­ scended from father to children and thence to children [again. The thrill of the sawdust ring has got into the blood. From the parent trunk branch­ es have crossed and crisscrossed until, as in the case of the Clarkonians and .the. Demotts and the Siegrists Flor^ [ enzes, great circus lines have been built up and guarded with the zealous care of a royal genealogy.-Bohemian Magazine. . j Doctors Thick In New York. The proportion of physicians to the general population is probably greater in New York city than anywhere else in the country. In for example, taking and s tated her s o r i ^ f ^ 1, 2, 3 and 4 cbritihiied their conversa­ tion where it had berih broken off.— New YOtk Herald. ' ^ At the Crossroads. \Why do,you object to Mrs. Brown for postmistress?” “I object to her ’cause I know she’d delay th’ distribution of tb’ mails.” \How so?” \You know jest as well as I do that she’d have to read every post card that came Into th’ office—an’ she’s al­ ways mislayin’ her specs!”—Cleveland Plain Dealer' nlation of the census bureau for 1908 as a basis, there Is lone licensed physi­ cian to every 709 persons; in New York state there is one to 672 and in New York city one to only 658. It has been estimated that the] physician in gen­ eral practice. must have a clientele of '750 persons, or 150 families, to support himself and his family in comfort, so if this estimate is [accurate the New York doctor , is short an average of a hundred patients, and many, of course, are further behind than thrit.—Medical CASTiORIA Poi I^ a n t s and Children. The Kind You Hajre Always Bought Bears the Signature of The Exceptions In the Case. \The path of true love is runhing smooth enough for us,” , fondly re-, marked the young wife as she kissed first her spouse and then their lovely babe. “Perhaps so,” replied the young hus­ band doubtfully as he eyed the wait­ ing cradle, \but' I must confess I see rocks ahead.’’—Baltimore American. Leuion, Choculate duel Cnstai please you. If your qrocer B who will. ^A Proper Title. \That doesn’t seem to be a very good fountain pen you’ve got.” \No it isn’t ” \What’s the name of it?” “ ‘Independent’ ” \Ah I see; quite appropriate! It doesn’t care whether it works or not.” —Philadelphia Press. Matter of Life and De.ath. Lady Tourist (with notebook)—Were you not afraid as you stood there in the jaws of death,?- Old Salt (remiuiscently)—Not that 1 knows of, ma’am. You see, I had been used to facing the jaws in life. I’m a married man.—Bohemian Magazine. The Real Thing. \And did you- have a good run in Arizona?” asked the privileged friend. \Well I/gue^ yes,” .replied the barn* storming ■ portrayer of * H amlet ‘!Fif- teen mil.es in one- ni^ht' with a mob behind you is going st>me, isn’t it?”— Chicago .And Well De.ycloped. \I don’t believe that .hunter has got any license.!,’ .'.. ; “ Guess -you ^'didn’t) hear him tell New Use For an Old Abuse. Miss judge (as the cat was carefully. washing itself)—Isn’t it too, bad that Polly G;ass wasn’t born a cat?. ? iijrs. Everything—Why? ‘ Mlsa. Judge—Then, she conld.nse her tongue on herself.—Bohemian Afaga- 22lne. \ ■ • -rBrbwniri^s MagaZihb. His M ^ i Ticket. ‘Ts that man you •just/bowed, tb your puMisher?” r i ^ % ^ friend. / \Oh nb',’’^rhpiied;. fhfe ; struggling poet;. ‘?that’.s ihy ;pawnbroker!”-^D6-; troit Tribune.: ■ . / . . ' the United States, the estimated pop- COend your cow, steer and horse hides, calf, doe: and .other skins to the Crosby Frisian Fur Company, Rochester, N. Y.. to be converted into Fur Coats, Rohes, Gloves, Mittens or Rugs. They are the largest custom Fur tanners of large wild anr domestic animal skins in the world. doijmestic Send lor illni animal istrated. catalog Do You Eat Pie? If not you are missing half the pleasures of life. Just order from yi'ur grocer a few packages of \i'UR-PIE”” andnd learuru how easyeasy it.t. iss to make tn yi'U. a lea ho oculate duel i i to r ard pies that will won’t supply you, go Every ’Vyoraan i« Oteco will he glad tp know that local grocers now have [in stock \OUR PIE” a preparation in three varieties for m a k in g Lemon, Chocolate arid Ciistird pies. Each 10-cent pack­ age makes two pies Be sure and order to-day. Don’tTry Uncertain Recipes. It is entirely uunece.ssary to experiment with this, that and another recipe. G^t fn»m vour grocer, for iU cents, a package'of “ OUR-PIE” Preparation-Lemon, Cnoc-.ilate or Cu''tard—lor making pies that are sure to be good. Lemon, Chocciate and Custards It, does not require an exaerleuced cook to make good pies from i\OU'R PIE.” Just the prt'per proportions of all ingredients are in the pai kage ready fur immediate, use At grocers, 10 cents per package Order a few packages to-day PEOPLE of the State ot New York, t ’ By the grace of God, free and independent, To Elizabetn Richardson, Emma Brady and Ada it TIMES M ESTATE AGENCY, I i - - - o T E Q o . W .V . .. y I t i I i I t t t t t t I I I I t t ¥ If y;.u Want to BU'/. SEuL or EXCHANGE _ // ^ ^PPly to this Agency. 32i A c b e ^ABM FOE SAI,E—32ji acres, -well timbered, good ^ tillable-land, good house and barn; in easy leach of ^ - \ ir-. -T'. 11 .-I ---- --------- # t f f 4§* ■ State road, E. F. D-, telephone, near school house- and church, three miles fi-oin- Otego village; with or ■withoutstoek. Low pried and easy terms. Posses- sion given: at once. . H ouse and L ot — Desirable lecation,,gQod roomy house, barn and large lot. A bargain fo't cash customer. Housa AND iiOT— Good house [and barn and fine garden. Nicely located and a bargain at $oQ0. H ouse and L ot —H ouee in good repair, w ith closet and city water. Large garden and J awn, and a niost de- ^ sirable location. Term^ made easy. . W a n p e d — House and lot in Tillage of Otego. Must be ^ in good repair and cheap for Cash deal. Apply to ^ this agency at once. ^ 185 A cre F arm for S ale —Good buildings, good land, ^ well watt red, close to state road, telephone conve- niences, , E. F. D, service and within easy reach of ^ village. Liow pi ice and easy terms. ' ^ ^ 4 l y If you have property to sell or exchange list it . with this agency, tf you jdesire to buy make your ^ wao^ known here. Other good paying property ^ not listed herein. y. S. FULLER, ^TEGO, N. T. I THEWORLOhUEATESf SEViriNB MACHINE F l i g h t RUNNii P . R. YOUNG, PH 0 T 06 RAPHER MMn Studio^ On^nta, N. jT« S t u d i o ifirJ trd n 7 d in : p p e n 2 d ’you want either a Vibrating Shuttle, Rotary Shuttle or a Single Thread [Chain kitch\- Sewing Machine write to THE HEW HOME SEWINO M AOHINE COMPAHY ^ Orange, Mass. Many sewing-machines are m ade to sell regardless of Quality, b u t the New Home is m ade to wear. Oiuc guaranty never Yiins out Sold by autbOrlzed dealers only. ' / FOR SAI^ BY V invention ^l8 probnblsr^atCTitab^^Commn^nli^ *'Vaten& taken t§rough°Mi:^*^!fc*i3o? tracelVe tpeeialnotiu, without charge, in the $tkHflf|c JUnerkaii. A handsomely lllnstrated weekly. Largest clr- cnlation of arty scientifle journal. Terms, $3 a year; four months, |L Sold by all newsdealers. New York ; Branch Office, 625 F St., Washington. D. C. NeTv Jevse.Y), George Be'esley, Cnicopee, Mass?- cliuseits, Eliza Ganwnghr,, Otego, N. Y., Daniel M. Vail, Waverlv, Pa.. Jennie' Hollenbeck, West D ivenport, N. Y., Rose Tamsett and Susie C. F. Guernsey. Otego, N. Yi, and all otliers Inter­ ested In the estate of Elizabeth Beesley, late of KILL the COUGH AND C U R E t h e l u n g s WITH Dr. King’s New Discovery PRICE _ OLDS’~ TriaLB^fiPw AWD ALL THROAT ANtfLUNG TOOWM-EI F 0 R C ? “ ®-”® GXTABANTljJED SATISFACTORY OB MONEY BEFU y P E D . iate of Slizaheth Beesley, late the town of Oiego, In County ot Otsego, <e- ceased, as, credli ore. legatees, next ot kin, otlienvl.se, s e n d g r e s t i : ~ You AND EACH d or OF YOU, are hereby cited and ly to b|e -and appear before our In the Village of Oooperstown, on the loth day of March, 1909, a t ten o^3lL)Ck in the forenoon of that day; tuen and there to attend the final j judicial settlement.of the account of proceedings ■ of Wood D. VauDeiwerkeh, as Executor-of the ; last will and Testament of s.ald Elizabeth Bees- j ley, decessed And those of twenty-one yea; guardian. If you have !6ne; 1_ „ ----- that you appear and apply for one pointed, or in the event of your neglect or laii- ure'bd-do so,- a guardlau|winbe appointed by the. .Surrogate to represent and act for you lu these' i> oceedlngs. ] ■ - • ' In .Testimony Whereof, we .-have caused the : seal of' office of our said Surrogate to be 'hm:eunto affixed: 1. ■ r Witness, Nathaniel P; Willis, Surrogate [LiS.] of .our said county,, a t the Village of Coi Mister Biil “ A M a n '’ NOW IN ITS f o u r t h . EDITION' s IT SHOULD B E m EVERY tlB ___ 12imo. FULLY IL L U S T ^ T E D ; • f L'W Order o f YoJir B e ^ t e n i f l '■ r i c i u r i 5 ^ a S | | i ^;^ ............... New Malay ppiuiii Ottre J .B e in g D i s ^ i b u t e d F r e e b y a K e w ; ' Coropeiiating with missions in \Malay- sia, the Windsor Laboratories of New jYork have secured a supply^ of the won­ derful combre turn plant, which has done so much to revolutionize the treatment of the opium habit. . ,A generolis supply of the new remedy, together with full instructic/ns tbr 1:3 use, 'aud United States consular reports •bearing'on the subj^t will be sent to any stifferer. To obtain a f*<-e supply of thjs remedy an,d the consular repoil':, address Windsor Laboratories.Branch 29. ,1^ East 25th Street. New York PUBLISHER S A V J l ,■- .. T ^ . r ' A FEW pOLIiAhS — ON YOUR— )FIItE INSURANCE PREMIUM ,_theiiexf policy eSplres, 'talk i). E. Robi«son _ A A lre ^ H. M. BARD V ” r;: «« .. ^ K^;r'6'’Brofid'^e'et, Oneonta•’Phones’'^

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